Berlin & Sachsenhausen Trip

My daughter and I took a weekend trip to Berlin last week. What a cool city this is. It is such a mish-mash of architecture, styles, and people and just plain fun. Found a great apt. to stay in, which was half the price of a hotel and it even had a kitchen. I'll post the website so you can find a B&B in Berlin too.

Daughter took the 4 hour walking tour with "Insider Berlin" on Friday and enjoyed it. For only 12 euros, you get to see all the main sites in the city along with getting a good orientation for where things are. I had done this tour in Sept. and found it to be so interesting that I had wanted her to go on it too. We both thought the book burning memorial was fascinating, but we found the Holocaust Memorial to be the "high point" of the tour. It is so disorienting when you get inside of it. The designer did an outstanding job getting this feeling across. I don't know if it was meant this way, but I found the size and solidness of stones conveyed such a feeling of strength and permanency.
The tour went lots of other places too, the Reichstag, churches, Brandenburg Gate naturally, museum island, Checkpoint Charlie, the spot where Hitlers bunker stood, and of course saw a remnant of the wall. I do have a weird connection with "the wall", as the communists had the audacity to build it on my birthday.

One of the best tips our guide gave, was to ride the bus 100, as it does sort of a round trip in the city and you get to see many of the sites that the "hop on, hop off" bus does, but doesn't cost extra. It was a double decker bus, so that was fun. Buying an all day metro ticket for Berlin is well worth the money.

Saturday, we took the "Insider" tour to the Sachsenhausen Concentration Camp. Even though I have lived in Germany for over 20 years, I had never gone to one of these "places of death". I wasn't really sure if I would cry or not, but I didn't. The weather was cold and blustery, which I found fitting for some reason. It drove home the point of how miserable it must have been to have had to stand outside for hours in nasty weather, being hosed down with water, doing back breaking work, or hanging from a post with your arms ripped out of your sockets. This was the 1st camp that the Nazis built and though it was intended to be for political prisoners, it eventually followed in the path of the other camps, with mass executions and gassing. Most of its' prisoners were homosexuals, Jehovah Witnesses, clergy who spoke out against the Nazis, communists, gypsies, and social misfits, like alcoholics, homeless men, or criminals. As time passed, more Jews were admitted.

It was eerie, entering buildings where so much pain and suffering was endured. The walls just have a sort of aura that you can feel. Especially the pathology lab and the cells for special prisoners. One of the buildings that was used as a kitchen, has just opened a new exhibit that everyone found fascinating. In fact, we would have liked to have had more time there. It has lots and lots of glass cases, filled with personal items, especially things the prisoners had made. They had made small, aluminum items like cigarette cases, things carved out of bits of wood and so on. Many of the items were made to trade for food. One man had made a complete, small chess set, using airplane plexiglass for the pieces. Our favorite item though, was a small sculpture of a boot, filled with flowers. It was quite pretty and extremely detailed, but when you read how it was made, amazement sets in. A young boy, not quite 16, had saved little pieces of his bread, to make this thing of beauty. He gave it as a gift to one of the prisoners, right before he died of TB.

I would like to go back there again and spend the day, as there is so much to see and I would like the time to really absorb it better.

There is a lot more I could say about this, but I think I will stop here. I do recommend that you go to Berlin and take this tour. Our guide was very informative and communicated her passion for passing on this part of history. Visiting Berlin itself, will also convey to you a sense of the history that has had such a huge impact on our world.

How I stopped Smoking

Like most people, I had tried to stop smoking using all kinds of methods. I also had actually stopped 3 different times, for up to a year, at various times in my life. I always felt like I was missing something though, like I was depriving myself of some wonderful treat. I used to think the only way I could really, permantly stop, was if I got hypnosis and changed the message in my brain that I got as a teenager, that smoking made me cool. Yeah, I always wanted to be cool. My ultimate goal in life.

I tried crushing the cigs up and throwing them in the trash. Ouch, that hurt, throwing a valuable commodity away. I tried writing contracts and having friends sign it as witnesses. Oh yeah, that worked real well. Not. I tried the patch for "medium" smokers. Talk about being wired! The nicotine gum tasted nasty so that didn't work. My favorite was asking friends for a cig and have them light it for me, and then I could sit at the bar with a cig in my hand and still look cool! Boy, there is nothing that pisses a smoker off like not "smoking" the cigarette that they gave you. It's funny now. How do you waste something that is going up in smoke anyway. It is wasted cause it isn't going into your lungs??? Weird. But on with the story.

Two years ago, I got the flu and the thought of smoking almost made me puke. This went on for 2 weeks and after I got better, I thought, well, I will try to not smoke anymore. I really, really wanted one though, and so I thought, if I just try this one day at a time, I can make it. At first, I had to break it down into 5 minutes at a time. As in, I really want a cig, but I won't smoke it now, I will smoke it in 5 minutes. Then I moved it up to an hour, I will have a cig in an hour, just not right now. Pretty soon, I could move it to the next day. I won't smoke today, but I can smoke tommorrow. From the very beginning, I also prayed a lot. Asking for help to stay stopped each day and at the end of the day saying thanks for the help. I do believe this was important for me to do. What I also did, and this amused a lot of people, was keeping track of how much money I was saving. I was a pack a day smoker, so that 4 euros a day added up quickly. Because I hadn't smoked for the 2 weeks I was sick, I had a good head start. Every day at work, I would make my big annoucement of how much money I had saved. I am sure this drove everyone nuts, but it helped me out tremendously. Every morning I made it a habit to calculate my savings. At 120 euros a month, it wasn't long before this sum was substantial. Money in the bank always makes me feel wonderful.

What was funny this time, was that after a couple of months, I didn't really miss it. I felt free and liberated. No more worrying about, did I have enough cigs for the night, do I have enough change, should I leave the house in the morning with enought time to stop by the kiosk, am I bothering my friends if I light one up, am I setting a bad example for my kids, and on and on? I am free, my ball and chain are gone. It it truly one of the best feelings in the world.

So, that is my story and I hope it will help any one else looking for a way out of their own cloud of smoke.

Smoking Amends

This is an open letter to everyone I ever stood next to, sat next to, or walked in front of, when I was smoking.

It was not until I stopped smoking that I even realized how annoying this is: when people walking in front of me, flick their ashes off and then they blow all over me. This drives me nuts! But, the thing is, I always did this too, and never even gave it a second thought. Standing OUTSIDE, waiting on the bus, I certainly never thought my smoke bothered anyone. Ok, occasionally I thought about it, but I justified it with the thought that we were OUTSIDE in the fresh air so why should it bother anyone? Now, those clouds of smoke blowing my way ARE an irritation, especially when I have just washed my hair. Another thing I used to do and never thought about too much, was lighting up on the escalator. Now all my clouds of smoke were actually driven into the face of the people behind me. How could I have been so thoughtless???

Now the worst, smoking when sitting next to people who don't. Especially my kids. I used to have this "not so smart idea", that if I just blew it away from them, it was ok, that it shouldn't bother them. Now I know better, and boy do I feel bad about subjecting them to all those years of smoke filled rooms. Yeah, the smoking in the restaurant thing was rude, but I was a MOM and I loved my children. Why this didn't enter my brain properly is a mystery, but until I stopped smoking 2 years ago, it didn't. I also feel bad about all the money I spent on my cigarettes and telling them we didn't have enough money for other stuff. It is such twisted thinking! I stopped smoking in Nov. almost 2 and half years ago, and have already saved 3,600 euros! Is that amazing or what? I am pretty sure I thought about this when I was smoking, that it was a pure waste of money, but not a big enough waste to stop.

So, this is my open apology to all of you who got subjected to my selfish behaviour. I am truly sorry.

(Some of you may be interested in how I stopped after 35 years of addiction, but I will save that for another post. )

A Cool Website

I just found this website yesterday and spent hours looking at it.
http://www.altfrankfurt.com
This morning, I went right back to it. It is chock full of old photos of Frankfurt. They have done a marvelous job of getting interesting tidbits of information about so many of the buildings, streets, etc. too.

I was most surprised to see the photo of American soldiers entering my neighborhood, Bornheim! I had no idea they came through here during the war. Some of the coolest photos are under the section: Zeppelin.

Of course the photos showing the destruction from the war are fascinating too. Hats off to the women of Frankfurt who cleaned the rubble up and literally rebuilt Frankfurt. They do not get enough credit for this enormous task. There certainly weren't many men around at that time to do it. In fact, they have tried for years to get some sort of pension from the government, but without much success.

Anyway, hope you enjoy the photos!

Nature in the City

I find it fascinating how much flora and fauna abounds here, in the middle of the city. It begins first thing in the morning, before it starts getting light outside. The birds start going bezirk! In the spring time, it starts around 05:30, but in the summer, when dawn is at 0400, those birds go crazy! I can remember when it actually used to drive me nuts, they were so loud. Today, I so enjoy laying in my bed, snuggled in my covers, listening to the little guys sending out their calls of love or their "stay away, this is my roof". It is funny how the littlest birds are the loudest. Or the plainest ones. Kinda like God thought, you can either be pretty or sing pretty. In the evenings, I enjoy watching the swallows swirl around, catching all those nasty mosquitoes. How they always know which direction to go, and I think they are really having fun, swooping and diving. If I was a bird, I would like to do that.

Last month, I saw one of the coolest things I have ever seen here in the city. I was taking out some trash, when I looked toward a big bush where a bunch of sparrows were freaking out. They were all inside of a bush, which didn' t have any leaves on it, but had lots of little branches. Sitting on top of the bush was some kind of hawk or falcon, (yeah, ornithology isn't my strong point) thinking he was going to have a sparrow for dinner that day. I just froze, wanting to watch what happened. The hawk tried several times to lunge into the bush, with the sparrows screaming all the time, and scrambling to change their positions. There must have been at least 20 of them "hiding" in this bush. The hawk was just too big to get thru the little branches though. This is the part of nature that is difficult for us humans. How to pick which animal to like better. If I like the hawk better, then I want it to catch a sparrow to eat. If I like the sparrow better, then I chase the hawk away and it goes hungry or its' babies go hungry. I pondered this for a few minutes while I watched, and then decided to like the sparrows better. I walked toward the bush and the hawk flew away. The sparrows wisely decided to hang out a while longer in their bush.

Spring is exploding now too. It has been fighting with winter for the past month or two, with the trees blooming kind of early and the daffodils popping out extra early. Walking around town, I see carpets of yellow daffodils, lots of aromatic hyacinths. Coming back from the gym on Sunday, I walked past an apt. building that literally had a carpet of violets. The entire lawn was purple! Gosh, that was pretty. Especially nice are the redbud trees, their branches have a nice, delicate look that matches their blooms perfectly.

One of my favorite animals are the little red squirrels. In Ohio we have these big, grey squirrels, that are bold and everywhere. Here, they are little and shy. You don't find them in too many places, but when you do, they are fun to watch. Those little tufts of fur on top of their ears is what makes them look so cute. You can often find them in cemetaries here.

The neighborhood where I used to work had some families of huge woodpeckers. They would often hang out on the lawn, kind of hopping around, looking for food I imagine. They almost look like parrots. It was always a surprise to see them tho.

Enjoy the spring, look for some wonders. I know I will.